Third Year Overview, When I Grow Up.

Now that it’s summer, I figured I should probably make a post on here….since last month was completely hectic. One may think that they have an excellent exam schedule….until they realize how much time they’ve wasted, resulting in very little time to study, hence the solution is to cram and study like you’ve never studied before. BUT, sometimes, that cramming thing actually works because you’re so determined and desperate to do well on your finals. And sometimes, you think you know nothing, but apparently all that cramming you did transferred useful information into your head, which translated in actually knowing things for your finals. Check please.  My week of finals in a nutshell = a drunk blur (substituting alcohol with academic knowledge stuff). I don’t remember much except for pages and pages of notes and countless hours spent in pseudo-solitude…because it got to a point where all my friends were done with their exams and I was still going…(that was slightly depressing). 

ENOUGH of that. 
It’s summer, and I’m enjoying every minute of doing nothing related to school – although that won’t be lasting for too long since I’m doing summer school, because I just LOVE school that much and CANNOT get enough of it. *mylife* 
I’m more excited than one would expect me to be, about the World Cup – yes, I actually watch soccer, be surprised. 

I can’t believe that I’m actually done third year…this is mind blowing. Who knew I would make it this far, not me. It’s weird to me to think  that just 3 years ago, I was still in grade 12….’ready’ to graduate from high school and ready to enter a new chapter of my life that would be called UBC. Now in approximately one year, I will be graduating from UBC – WWHHHAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!? I’m not even ready to talk about that. Be warned all you future first years, your undergrad goes by at the speed of light.
I can hands down say that this was probably one of the best years of my undergrad(apart from first year…really wasn’t too fond of second year, it was okay). This year was a year of learning and independence. This year gave me a sense of  purpose I hadn’t felt before and shaped me as a person through experiences and the people I chose to surround myself with. Second term of this year was probably my favourite, I got closer to a lot of people and met lots of new people that I was really able to connect with on many levels – people that would be with me as I progressed. I think I matured a lot this past year, and well, maturing is a great thing in life – makes you feel old, but it’s real. As a result, my way of thinking has evolved and the way I approach situations and circumstances has also changed. It has allowed me to gain a broader perspective on life(actually), and actually apply the knowledge I’ve gained through various interactions. I hate to say this, but I almost feel like an adult…it’s weird. Looking back since I graduated high school when I was basically a ‘kid’, it boggles me how much I’ve changed as a person. Seventeen year old me and twenty year old me are NOT the same. We may ‘look’ the same, but we do not ‘think’ the same  – experience changes people, and it’s weird, but in a cool way. Experience allows you to let go of people that probably shouldn’t stay in your life, and hold on to the ones that do belong by your side.

This Is It. 2 YEARS, WHUT.

Well, happy 2 years of blogging TO ME. WordPress had to remind me, but I did remember that my “bloggeversary” was coming up shortly! I’m officially done with summer school, time to enjoy my summer regardless of how my final may or may not have gone. :S EEK. I can’t believe I’ve been blogging for 2 boggles my mind to think I’ve kept up with this for so long. I also thank each and every person, spammer and non-spammer for visiting my blog and reading little slices of my life; and for those of you who leave a little piece of your mind with a comment, I enjoy reading every single one of them. I apologize if I bored you to death or irritated you with my ramblings, but what can a girl do? If you’ve ever considered blogging, I suggest you go through with it, and if you keep up with it, you won’t regret it a single bit! 🙂 

Shattered Feelings

To you I reached out
To give me strength
I said to you, listen
You did and it grew
Growing to what we couldn’t handle
Grasplessly losing control
It gave us pain and caused us hurt
I held my breath
You took it away
Taking me up and taking me down
To new heights and old depths
A never ending cycle
Something all too familiar
Of retreating to the issue and straying from the truth
Shattered hearts and streaming tears
Out of our hands it became
Breaking us down
Pieces crumbled
We fell apart
Then silence.
Silence was the answer
Silence was golden.


RandomRamblings: catching up on life

Every now and then it’s good to take a few moments to debrief, you know, like sit down and reflect on life. 
Random fact of the day: I have a slight obsession with the song Beauty And A Beat, and not so much the original but the majority of the covers of that song. Although I do find the original catchy…and I’m not a particular fan of either Bieber or Minaj. I always go on about how much I don’t like Nicki Minaj, but then every time she releases a song, I’m all over it. They’re just so catchy… 
The Student Leadership Conference is only 2 days away..if you’re going, BE EXCITED…if you’re not going..GO SIGN UP! TIME IS TICKING. And then, BE EXCITED. 
The amount of procrastinating that I’m doing right now is mind blowing…..but I really wanted to write random ramblings about random ramblingable things! 
I don’t know if it’s just me or if “negativity” on the internet has strikingly increased in the past 2 months among teenagers. Or maybe I’ve just been noticing it recently? OOORRR maybe it’s just because I’ve been on tumblr too much in the past 2 months and I keep reading super negative/sad posts everywhere…. why can’t people just be happy? maybe have a tad bit more optimism in their views? One thing that I’ve recently “re”learned is that, when negativity surrounds you, it can deeply affect you in a VERY negative way. Been there, done that, never want to go back. Also, sometimes you need to worry about yourself and keeping yourself happy before you try to go about and try to make OTHERS happy. If you continuously go out of your way to constantly make someone else happy, and you’re not taking care of yourself, you will exhaust yourself, and even lose yourself. As selfish as it may sound, you need to make sure that you, personally(mentally,physically,spiritually,emotionally,etc), can afford to invest time and effort into the well being of others. If you can’t, then you’re not helping yourself, and you may not be helping the other to the best of your ability. So, always take care of yourself. Don’t get too preoccupied with helping others(this probably sounds TERRIBLE…I’m all for helping others, really, I am!), you need to make sure that you are in the right state to do so, otherwise you’re causing unnecessary stress upon yourself. Nobody wants an extra side of stress on their plate if it’s avoidable!
It’s freezing outside. There’s even a sub zero temperature warning in place for the next couple days – I didn’t even know those existed.

The Season of Giving – That’s a Wrap.

It has been a wonderfantasticful 366 days(since this year was a leap year), but alas, it must come to an end. 
Back to U of BC tomorrow…does anyone even call it that? I dunno. 
It’s been a lovely year, and has been coming to an end quite nicely in my opinion. My mom and I were doing some last minute errands before I head back tomorrow and our last stop was at a grocery store, since I thrive off of food and all. Just as we had pulled into the parking lot in front of the store a certain person caught my attention. Why did he catch my attention? Well, firstly, he had a dog with him, and the dog was wearing a pink jacket – and he was wearing ratty clothes and he definitely didn’t look like he had bathed in quite some time. A few minutes after I had entered the store, I saw him walking up to the beverage isle and reaching for some rootbeer, with a carton of milk and bread in hand. Just as he was going towards the front of the store, a guy went up to him. Now THIS is where I thought things were starting to get a little interesting; so I wandered away from my mom and pretended to ponder upon the display of noodles so that I could eavesdrop on the conversation between the two men. The guy took the milk from him and then it turned out that he was buying this guy groceries(including dog food for his dog!). This melted my heart. The cashier and this extremely nice and generous man loaded up a cart with about 7 bags of groceries and wished the man a happy new year and off he went pushing his cart full of groceries. I had always heard about such things happening before, but when you actually witness something like this, it’s a COMPLETELY different feeling. Gestures like this is what the holiday season is all about, providing for those who can’t provide for themselves. Be thankful for all that you have and end this year with a bang and start the new year with a boom.

It Doesn’t Have To Be Like This…

Bullying. Something I have zero tolerance for. October is Bullying Prevention Awareness Month…shouldn’t EVERY month be ‘Bullying Prevention Awareness Month’ ? One month in a year isn’t enough for emphasis on bullying to be shown. Many of you are probably now aware of the story of Amanda Todd, a young girl that found her escape from a terrible reality by taking her own life. Amanda Todd – Vancouver Sun  This is extremely devastating, but we can’t wait for tragic things like this to happen in order to be aware of the bullying in our society. They say “it’s never too late”, this is true, but in this individual case, it was too late. This is the most heart breaking story I have heard in a long time. How alone and in pain must this girl have been to take her life? Death was the only escape path in her mind. Looking at pictures, on the outside she looked like any other teenage girl, but inside she was broken, alone, and living in fear. She made that video of her story to inspire people; she has truly impacted everyone around her. She was only fifteen years-old, she had her whole life ahead of her. Isn’t there something wrong with the picture? How can people be so cruel as to lead someone to commit suicide?
Who needs weapons when words have the power to kill? Almost everyone goes through some form of bullying at some point in their lives. There are extreme cases, and less extreme cases, but nonetheless, bullying, is bullying. I personally can say that I’ve had my own dish of ‘bullying’ served to me, but it’s about shaking it off and looking forward and thinking about what great things are to come in the future. Press forward, the prize is worth it. In a race, you can’t turn back once you’ve started, you have to push forward and make it to the finish line. That feeling you get once you’ve crossed the finish line – words can’t even explain it, but it feels good. Sometimes you don’t realize that you’ve been through rough times until things get better. We can all watch things happening and sympathize, but how many of us go out and do something about it? What CAN we do? Can we afford to lose people due to such reasons? Do we realize how easily these kind of things could be prevented? We can sit in our seats and feel bad, but we have to be proactive. Be there for people when they need someone. There’s always hope, never deprive someone of hope. There’s a pot of gold at the end of every rainbow. Breaking free from those chains of bullying will bring you great freedom. Middle/High School are difficult times for many teenagers, but why does it have to be like that? What happens in high school, should stay in high school; once you graduate, it’s all over – high school is old news. Live the life you’ve been given, while you can. We are all beautiful people trying to find a place in this world. No one deserves to be a victim of bullying. We deserve to enjoy the life we’ve been given and to make the best out of it, regardless of what other people’s intentions are. When you show that you’re fearless, people will back away. There are always people out there to listen to what you have to say, people that you don’t even know, care. There are 7 billion people in this world, don’t think that you’re ever alone. Give people a chance to reach out to you. Bullying isn’t something that should slip through the cracks. Pay attention to the people around you, spread the word, and stand up. 
RIP Amanda Todd – the hearts your story has touched – more than you ever thought. 

Story Of My Life.

Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swamps of the not quite, the not yet, and the not at all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved and have never been able to reach. The world you desire can be won. It exists. It is real. It is possible. It is yours.